Road Trip

Oh my, what were we thinking? A road trip with a six month old is not as easy as just hopping in the car.

But thankfully, Isaac has rolled on the road much better than he could have. He's for the most part such an easy-going baby, he just gets frustrated sometimes at his parents carting him all over the map in a car seat.

Gone are the days of Momma holding babe in the front seat of the station wagon. Now we've got the souped up SUV packing an all-out safety seat complete with head protection, five-point harness and a shell practically made of titanium. At least it's heavy enough to be. And with babe not being held, awake times in the car = unhappy times for the most part.

Day one. We had swim lessons in the morning so planned to leave right after. Of course, there's always just 'one more thing' that has to be done before leaving town. Which turned into many more 'one more things'. Which turned into two hours later before we finally hit the road.

And by hit the road, I mean drive about 15 minutes out of town only to be stopped by highway construction. We drove 10 km in about 45 minutes. Sigh, not a good start. Luckily Isaac slept for part of that and when he awoke he only cried for a little while before conking out again.

We stopped in Merritt so I could nurse Isaac. We actually had to wake him up to feed him - I was worried he'd gone a long time between meals and would be very hungry and very upset if he woke up on the road. This way, I figured, we'd bypass the empty tummy and keep baby happy.


Merritt nursing stop. Hot weather kept Isaac in just a onesie for the afternoon.
The next stop was in Armstrong. We had one grumpy baby by that time and dinner plans with a new friend we'd never met in person. There were two other babies there born within two weeks of Isaac and, once again, he was behind them developmentally. Boo.

Isaac fussed lots but we made it through dinner. I nursed him in the basement, we enjoyed a bit of dessert then headed off to my uncle's for the night.

Whew. Day one: done.

Six months!

Dear Isaac,



You are six months old today my baby! I can't believe we've made it to half a year already. The time has gone quickly, and some days it seems like just a few weeks ago that we brought you home from the hospital and marveled that you were ours and we were your parents.

You are such a happy baby. When you've had a good sleep, you wake up groggy and cuddly. After a few minutes you're ready to explore, swinging your head this way and that to see what's new. You smile a lot, especially when you see Daddy or me watching you as you play and explore your world. When we talk to you, you get positively giddy, wiggling and kicking and smiling that big beautiful open-mouthed smile we love so much.

You rolled from your tummy to your back early on, I think in early February. But after a few times doing that within a couple days you didn't roll over again for a long time.

Now you can roll over from your tummy to your back either way. That was such a struggle for you before and I think it was last week, you all of a sudden just "got it." It was so effortless for you, you simply rolled. We couldn't have been prouder of you at that moment, and thankfully Daddy and I were both there to see it.

You've been speaking to us for awhile now, saying 'ahh' in all sorts of ways. And a couple days ago I started to hear what I think is 'ga'. You love talking to us; yesterday when Daddy stopped in from working for the paper all day, you just kept talking to him. You must have been telling him all the fun we'd been up to while he was away!

You are obsessed with your hands: your left and right take turns in your mouth, alternating your fists, your fingers, your thumb and what we think is your favourite combo: thumb and index finger in there together. At night time when you're winding down you can be spotted in your crib clasping and releasing your hands as you stare off into space. Your hands are both a comfort and a distraction to you, an interesting pastime and a means to an end.

Your favourite toys are definitely Sophie the giraffe and your ball. With the ball you can lay on a blanket for a good 20 minutes sometimes just playing with it, passing it back and forth and putting what you can of it in your mouth. You also love 'Puppy', and open your mouth to try and fit him in whenever he comes near!


As for apparatus, you definitely love your playmat the best. Even when you're in a grumpy mood, if we put you on the mat you will smile and wiggle and kick and grab at the hanging links above your head. You are also enjoying the jumperoo more and more, and can kick up a fierce storm in there when you want to.

Your sleep patterns are sometimes good, sometimes not so much. Your ideal day is to be up for about an hour and a half, sleep for two hours, be awake for another couple hours, sleep for about an hour and a half and have a quick catnap in the evening before bed. It doesn't usually work out that way but we sure try! Often you have no problem falling asleep. It's just staying asleep that's the issue. You wake up crying and not wanting to be in your crib, but we're still working on that and are confident that things will slowly get better over time. You still wake up a few times at night to nurse which I'm fine with as I love nursing you and cherish our quiet moments together.

You still love nursing, and look at me and smile when you realize it's time to eat. You also love cuddling, usually with someone standing to hold you, not sitting!

In the evenings we have a very good bedtime routine that helps you to know sleep time is coming. You have a bath every night which you used to hate but now you enjoy. You play with your plastic keys, swinging them back and forth and bringing them to your mouth while Daddy and I wet your body and rub creamy soap into your hair. I take you from your bath to get you dressed for bed. Then either Daddy or I read three stories to you, always always ending in 'Hello Baby', by far your favourite book. You smile when we pick that book up and turn the pages. Then we pray for you. Then one of us sings to you a couple songs, always ending in 'I Love the Mountains' Discovery song.

You've taken to eating solids like a champ. You have now tried rice cereal, avocado, butternut squash and sweet potato. You are very good about keeping your hands out of your mouth for the first little while then before we reach the end of the bowl you've got your hands in your food-filled mouth and you make quite a mess! Daddy loves feeding you solids, it tends to be one of your special times together every day.

You are such a joy to everyone around you. We are all thrilled to know you and to see you grow Isaac.

There is so much more I could write, but that is at least a little bit about you at six months. We are so very thankful that you are our boy. Every day with you is a gift and I thank the Lord every single day for blessing us with you. Thank you for being my baby. I love you so much!

Love your Momma

Happiness is...

I like the idea of counting my blessings, one by one. It's an old hymn, but for many people it's a new concept. I've seen '1,000 gifts', 'blessings journal', and other similar gimmicks all with the same general idea of counting the good stuff in life. No matter how it's done, it's a good idea.

I often find happiness sandwiched between the stuff of life, unexpected pleasures in the everyday is often the only momentum needed to keep this train of life chugging. With that being said, I like the idea of tracking happiness - big moments and little, everyday and extraordinary - in my blog. After all, this is a compendium of my life so I can. And so I shall.

For the sake of order, I'm going to number from 1,000 down, because that's what lots of people seem to do and I like the idea.

Happiness is ...


1,000: Finding money on a Timmy's gift card for a morning coffee run to fuel today's writing.

999: Not having to use the plunger, just flushing twice. (Hey, I never said this list would be glamorous, but for a girl who HATES using the plunger, this is one of those occurrences worth celebrating)

998: The feel of a new, plush carpet under my feet.

On being a mom

Happy Mother's Day to me!

Last Mother's Day, it was a beautiful sunny Spring day and we decided to take a picnic up to Hicks Lake. That was the plan for this Mother's Day too but it's supposed to rain so Justin is going to make me a picnic lunch to eat in front of our fireplace instead. The important thing is I've got my hubby and my baby to share it with, so the location is not so important as the company.

Reflecting on being a mommy for almost the last six months (in one week - wow!), I have found motherhood to be both the most natural thing in the world and the hardest thing at the same time. Now that I'm a mom, I feel like it was what I was born to do. I can't imagine my life without Isaac and I love cuddling him, nursing him, making him smile and laugh and watching as he learns new things. I even love diaper changes as he is always happy on the change table and we can get smiles even when he's otherwise grumpy.

And I love watching as he grows and learns and changes. It gives me a deep and quiet satisfaction, knowing that is my son and one day he'll be a man and I got to be a part of his life.

But being a mommy is so hard too. For one thing, a part of my heart is beating in another body now. And the part of my heart that's left feels raw and exposed. So much emotion it's hard not to cry every day. Most of the time I want to cry for joy, at the sheer amazement that this is my child and I am so in love with him. Sometimes I cry because I'm scared that I'm not doing enough, not raising him the best I can. Sometimes I cry because it's so hard when he's not sleeping and I'm so tired and I can't figure out how to make everything better. So yeah, lots of tears and lots of almost-crying moments.

It's like all of my emotions are in overdrive. Like they're heightened. I suspect this is what drugs does to people, just makes everything brighter, more intense. That's the right word. All my emotions are more intense now. I like it and am scared of it at the same time.

Growing up, I never thought I would become a mom. Now, I can't imagine my life any other way. I love it, and am glad I get to celebrate being a mom on this special day. Thanks Isaac, for being my son. Thanks Justin, for giving me the best gift ever. I love both of you with a passion and intensity that knows no bounds.

Happy Mother's Day to me!

Love is...

Love is feeding my baby when he calls for me, instead of trying to achieve the elusive goal of sleeping through the night.

Love is waiting 45 minutes to use the bathroom because my baby wakes up needing love and milk.

Love is lingering even longer while changing him to steal as many smiles and bright sunshine faces as I can. I store them in my happy moments bank. I stack memories like precious papers in my brain, filing them for the future. Hoping enough of them will keep well and I can pull out these moments again and again through the years and centuries and read them in my mind's eye. I know these days are fleeting and I treasure them.

Love is holding a crying baby next to my ear because he is comforted when held over my shoulder. Love is holding him harder when he cries louder because it's then he needs me even more.

Love is this boy.

First food

Isaac just pounded down his first solid food. A bowl of mushy beige rice cereal. We took him to the pediatrician last week because we were concerned about a possible lazy eye. We're extra cautious about his eyes since Justin has a lazy eye and we don't want to miss any early signs for our baby. Dr. Ebesh had seen Isaac once before for his weight and at the time he was on track to gaining what he was supposed to be gaining. This appointment Isaac was weighed and it turns out that since his appointment at the beginning of February he as gained only 11 grams a day (minimum is supposed to be 15 or 20). Needless to say we were disappointed.

I didn't think Isaac would get much in his mouth but he actually did quite well. Justin and I took turns spoon feeding him and he didn't thrust it all out his mouth like we expected. He almost looked like he was trying to lick the spoon which makes sense when you think about how he nurses.

He didn't seem surprised to have something different in his mouth either. The funniest thing that kept happening was he would force his fist or at least his thumb past the spoon, like it was a competition and he wasn't about to lose. Isaac LOVES to have his fist or fingers in his mouth so anything else that tries to make its way in there has to get past him first!

I have so many mixed emotions about this big milestone. It saddens me that I can't provide everything my baby needs anymore. Each milestone is a step away from total dependency. I know that should make me happy, and it does. But it also makes me sad because it means my baby needs me less and less for his physical needs. Before I know it, he'll be eating all solids and not breastfeeding, then no diapers or help speaking and all of a sudden I'm going to have a high school graduate on my hands who doesn't need me at all. OK, I know that's still a long ways away but still...

So, we've achieved a big step today. Now the only question is, who gets to change Isaac's first 'real' poopy diaper?

I'm gonna pull the "I feed him all the time" card and let Justin change this one!

My big brother

Well, Dave is gone and I'm already missing having my big brother around. He and Cheryl and Bryan spent the last week here. It was fun having them around. We went to Vancouver, explored Chinatown, played games, ate meals together, had them over to our house, relaxed in the hot tub, went on a walk around Cultus, and got to spend time just hanging out.
I'm blessed to have a family I actually want to spend time with. Just wish my one and only brother was closer so we could see each other more. But it warms my heart to know how much he loves my little son already, it was great to see David pick up Isaac and hold him. Love it!
I want my son to have a close relationship with his (hopeful) sibling some day. Life is just better when you can share it with people who love you no matter what.